Thursday, July 29, 2004


Things have been a little less busy in my mind...which means more pondering...

Haha no...the past couple weeks have been God...and in another word, good. I'm finding that I don't update much because I feel like i have to have something to say whenever I write here. And I honestly try...but I don't feel like dragging out the words if I'm not feeling it at the moment y'know? Every say, month or so...I kind of hit an epiphany about life, God, relationships, and reality and what God. Things come out easy then, but everything in between is somewhat of a fuzz, blur, and mass confusion.

I tend to prefer clarity.

Well you say, why don't you just blog about what's been confusing you or considering? See, most of the time i don't even have clarity on my confusion, so that just throws a wrench in the whole thing. People who ask me how I'm doing often get this response..."hmm....i dunno" in the midst of a bunch of "well, i've been thinking about this" or "this has been wierd."

In other words, I don't have a clue.

Anyways, I don't know what I always bust out with these entries after a long period of silence....I guess I feel the need to justify my absence to the anonymous world wide web.


I believe I am missing out on opportunities, everyday, to be iron that sharpens iron.

In a community, there are the thermometers and the heaters/coolers. The thermometers are the ones that just go with the flow. If people are laughing with something, they'll laugh along. If the conversation is relatively on the surface...they stay on the surface; if the conversation gets deep, they get deep. The go wherever everyone else goes.

The heaters/coolerse are people who direct the conversation. They can direct wherever they want to go.

The thermometers...people who are just kind of there. You know what happens when you get a room full of thermometers? Nothing. But what happens if you get in a community where people are heaters...there are people that change the atmosphere that they are in, they don't conform to room temperature. The room gets HOT HOT HOT. What this world needs is not more needs more heaters. People who walk out the reality of Acts in their daily lives. People who walk with outrageous humility and ridiculous power. People who dispense grace and overflow with love and joy.

I find myself always trying to "fit in" and to be platable to whatever community I'm in. I think there is something to be said about being relevant. Sometimes Christians can get so weird that the weirdness overshadows the message...ok, relevance is good. But I think most of us are too busy being relevant that we have become thermometers. We're indistinguishable from the world. We watch, say, and do all the same things. And on select days we bust out our Christian sub-culture.

I'm being unfair and over-generalized. Ok. Perhaps.

But let me ask you something. When Jesus walked into the room, I can guarantee you He was the hottest thing in there. And I'm not referring to physical appearance. Whether I'm a guy or girl, when I walk into a room...the last thing I want people to be saying is "wow, he/she is kind of cute...I should check them out." What do you think it was a like being a room where Jesus walked in? What do you think it's like when you walk in the room? I want people to experience what it was like when Jesus walked in the room when I walk into a room. I want them to be so aware of the presence of God.

In Acts, people in Peter's shadow were healed. Is that a heater or thermometer? Believers are supposed to CHANGE the atmosphere b/c we carry the life and death of Jesus Christ and his presence with us wherever we go. The Word says that we were to do GREATER things than Jesus and the apostles did!

If this doesn't blow your mind, I'm not sure what does. This blows my mind.

I'm looking at my life and at the church and I'm thinking...hmmm, there's a slight inconsistency between this reality and the reality of God that is found in Acts. God is the same yesterday, today, and I'm thinking ...maybe, maybe there's something wrong with what I'm doing with my life.

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