Monday, March 01, 2004

Its March 1. Which means several things.

Switchfoot this friday for Winterfest. Strangely, I'm not as stoked as I have making it out to be.

The day after February 29. Leap day, last leap day that lands on a Sunday for 28 years. More on that later.

It's Week 9 of school, which means that finals is less than two weeks away. Spring break is rolling around, and my old nemesis spring quarter returns.

Its nearing time for end of quarter reflection.

In regards to Switchfoot, I dunno ... I guess I'm not excited as I would think. If you've known me for any measure of time ... you know that I just about went buck wild when the Switchfoot cd came out. You will also know that I wasn't as swept away by the Switchfoot concert I went to last quarter as I would have hoped. Which generally seems to be the trend this year ... things that I've been emotionally stoked for have let me down almost without fail. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing ... but sometimes I feel like I've been emotionally flatlining. Some people have told me that I'm maturing. I hope not. But maybe this is what happens when you get past that infantile emotional up and downs and start living out consistency. Who knows. I guess I'm just bracing myself against an emotional letdown. I'm not even sure if I'll be going this Friday.

I would say that Sunday, February 29, 2004 was probably one of the more memorable days of my life.

To backtrack a little bit, you've probably noticed I haven't posted as much on my blog this quarter ... and its not that I don't want to, I do. Some of you have expressed being encouraged by my sharings, and that's encouraging to know. I've always made it a point not to just leave this blog as a "what did Benson do today" thing because I'm sure y'all have better things to do with your time. This blog challenges me too ... to write with clarity, to communicate what's so clear in my mind to other people. It also challenges me to remember what God has been doing. Its easy to forget that sometimes. Anyway, I've been learning a bit to babble less and to think more. A lot of times I'm tempted to just write about what has been going ... what struggles. But honestly, many of those things fade away after several days. And when you step back, they're really inconsequential...

So in some ways, that's where I find myself right now. Its been a horrific quarter in some ways ... I've never felt so yanked so far up and down emotionally than I have this quarter, I've had to work through some pretty tough moments with me and God (which basically consisted of me just hanging by a thread and asking God for the grace to make it through), been a lot of changes in my heart and life. I'm not sure I can necessarily elaborate on all those specifically ... but I do know I'm different. Very much in the same way I felt significantly different after Fall Quarter. And yeah, in many of the previous ways mentioned ... it has been a glorious quarter.

This Sunday was definitely a memorial of sorts for me. Made several commitments that I've been wrestling with for the past several months. All the shaking and transitioning that went on this quarter has put me in a position to be where I am right now. It certainly was not apparent when I was in the midst of some of this stuff ... but here I am. God has certainly proved himself to be the best author of this thing called life ... He's been sovereign and faithful to complete what he has begun.

Anyway, 'tis all for now. More laters

No comments:

Post a Comment